Lost: Corner of a Sectional Couch
The conversation reads in my head like this:
Woman: We’ve got to get rid of this old couch. It’s so old and…
Man: I like it fine in the basement where it is.
Woman: It’s not even good enough for the basement. Honestly, I’m embarrassed to have it in the house. We’ve got to take it to Goodwill.
Man: Hmph. All right, I’ll get the truck.
Twenty minutes later:
If you have any other thoughts as to how this could have gotten on the side of PA 309, please let me know!
Aliens. Or perhaps a very small and localized tornado. Or aliens.
You’re a conspiracy theorist. There’s no such thing as a tornado.
Migratory central pieces of sectionals. Center pieces (the center only) have been turning up in large quantities in the southeast. They are being sold as “Corner chairs”. I feel somewhat responsible for this mass migration. Roughly twelve years ago I was a Manager for America’s Thrift Stores. Don’t think Goodwill or Salvation Army. Imagine Walmart and you are close to the stores sales floor in fact in Chattanooga at that time they had taken an old Sam’s Club and made it their own. Back to my part I was the Assistant manager and the store manager and District manager and I where in the back pricing furniture. The District manager told me to toss the green center of a sectional that had come off one of the trucks. He assured me no one would buy it. I have a slight sarcastic streak that raises up and I challenged him to let me put it on the sales floor at ten bucks (9.88) using the unique pricing system and said if it was not sold when he came back in five business days I would buy his lunch. I priced it and we always had to write a description on the tag so, all I could think was that would fit in the corner of someone’s basement. So I put “limited edition corner chair”. It sold in 3 days I should have put Fifteen on it. After that when home office found out we could get ten bucks off something they used to throw away……Policy change. About a year later I noticed Goodwill selling them for twenty or eight depending on what lunatic had the pricing gun. So this is a lone lost center piece that was attempting its migration to a thrift store… It was possibly not fastened by duct tape or bungee cords (materials known to hold the very fabric of reality in place) thus it’s current location.
That’s almost exactly what happened. Yes.